The moment has finally arrived!! The last 5+ years, I have spent working as a technical support specialist for a company that had my heart. Then the Lord started calling my heart home and it took some time to find the right people to train and leave my position responsibly. But I have, after two years of saying I was resigning, - actually done it! The process leading up to it has been an adjustment in my thinking. I know the importance of mothering well (probably the most important job ever for the future of our world), but letting go of the gratification of projects, deadlines, pursuing my interests, and using my talents is a hard one for my type-A personality to adjust to. It feels wrong to replace finite tasks and view-able results with infinite ones that go mostly unnoticed. I know my ego has been hit most. My mind has had to fight off the feeling of guilt (from not bringing in a paycheck, aka feeling like you are 'tangibly helping'), shame (a stay at home mom seems somehow less than, especially in this social media age, because it is mostly invisible), laziness (no deadline, checklists or schedule to keep other than my own) and doubt (analyzing the pros and cons of everything). I need to stop focusing on the lies of guilt, shame, laziness and doubt and start celebrating my freedom! Let's focus on the good things:
You might be saying, "I work from home or I work and am trying to do all those things too!!" The truth is that I am still a work at home mom. I still have people who require things of me - they are just shorter. ;) I still have lots of tasks to complete! Seems like more than before some days because I actually can get to some of those seasonal things like cleaning the stove and windows or organizing and de-cluttering. By resigning my job, (what SAHM means for me) I have one less ball in the air, less stress, more peace, more time to be in the moment and hopefully enjoy it! For this season I am grateful for fewer demands on my time and for peace by walking in obedience to what God has called me to do. No matter what your title, whether you "work" or not, find your freedom. I pray you find a peaceful moment and not just rush to do the next thing. *And a thank you to my husband who supports, encourages and loves me and our children well!
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